The One Where She Chats Too Much...

But you decided to be here with me,
No coincidence it was meant to be...

so. i think i have a death wish. on my hard earned dollars. everything i want is so expensive. when did life get so expensive? i remember the days of 50c/L petrol. 10c for a mix bag of lollies. 30c soft serve at ALL mcdonalds. more to the point though. when did the things that would satisfy me become so costly? does it just come with growing up? or is it just the wanting it now that's killing me? or can i blame the economy?

i've been writing lists lately. i find them soothing. it doesn't matter if i actually achieve any of these points on my list. just physically putting them out there on paper can be enough. bad isn't it? being content with just 'putting it out there' rather than achieving them. no way can i achieve them all at once anyways, i'd need about $6000 straight up to buy everything. and thats not even my complete list - not all the dslr goods are on it or that pretty car i have in mind - which reminds me, i need to get my P's (more on that later), which are things i want too. but the other stuff i've been thinking about constantly. check out my list.

i feel like such a tech nerd - items 1 through to 6 are all geeky stuff. but seriously if i manage to get all this stuff i think that would keep my happy for a long while. more superficial and attainable stuff would be on my lists. like the shoes. i'm loving me a strappy shoe and brogues, both are an easy $140 but good shoes don't come cheap. my feet have suffered enough from shitty heels. flats are real genius but not all outfits suit flats. even a good pair.

still i'm proud of myself. my phone has been broken for a couple months now. yeah my crappy E250 or something or other. it's actually been broken for a while now - certain buttons refused to function, i could not go up or down or go back one step. so sucked to make a mistake cause i'd have to start all over again. but anyway. it broke of good - as in the screen died; no more-bye bye-sayonara sucker. so it brought me back to one of my high school phones. urghh just saying "back to high school" makes me want to hurl at how old that makes me feel. i mean 19yo. that's still pretty young on a life scale. but shit -and these days i don't use profanity lightly.- the twenties are dawning on us now. thats some major stuff. i'm expecting some life changes to happen in that decade. friends will get married, maybe even have kids. but more on time passing later (maybe).

so as you can see i've become abit of an apple fangirl. even though i thoroughly remember swearing apple off - at least ipod wise - it died on me a couple years after purchase. though i was pretty good to it. i remember ray and courtneys breaking down way before mine and mine was older. but i was abit of a tight wad with it. it was my baby back then you see. it was always in my general view. and never entrusted to the klutzes or rough housers. but i've slowly come round back to apple. their design is just so minimal and sleek. i'm not so "a is for apple and pc is for piece of crap". i enjoy both worlds but apple just does design better. it does geek tech with design in mind. and of course back in '03 tech was not where it is now. apple is just sexy. and its generally used in the industry i'm thinking of cracking into.

speaking of careers. i'd really like a job at apple. i think it would be fun. but in the long term. i just don't know what to do with my life. i don't think i'll be one of those people sticking to one job for the rest of my life. i really think i'll slowly lose my sanity in the monotony. sure i love my 2 casual jobs right now. they get stuff paid for. but seriously- i need to earn more serious cash if i want to be able to afford the things i want and become more independent for it. i want to try different things. and i want to travel too (and we all know that cost lots is money). my brain is running 986720986469432km/hr and i don't know if i'm getting this all through eloquently enough. i never was blessed with a large vocab. that year with mr cinquetti as an english teacher changed my life. though i think my life did a bit of one step forward two steps back cause alot of it has escaped me. but i digress. what was i talking about... i'm probably going to be repeating stuff and going all over the place but who cares? - not me and that's all that matters. structure is for that philosophy paper due tomorrow at 11am.

i really can't wait for tax return. apparently i've been getting taxed even though i earn less that $6000/yr but hey. i could use the money now. so it's like i saved $400 - so that should be my ipod touch and the incase from my list. though only time will tell really how my finances are in about a month. though i have been quite the good girl and i haven't bought anything too flash since my trek to dfo in april. but i do have that monthly deduction to pay off my dslr - $120 to hsbc every 11th. and then ING takes $50 away too. so i am saving. proud much? i know i am.

but on to more stuff... sydney apple store is open =D after tafe winds up i'm going to head down there. maybe i'll go while i shop for elisha's birthday present. she's turning 10! can you believe that? elisha's birthday brings with it a multitude of anniversaries for my family. her age is on par with how old our prado is and also how long i've been a westie! Time has gone by so fast!!!! but anyways back to me =P Elisha's bday is first week of july so i should be going in the next week. I really want to get a haircut too my hair is not well past my shoulders and i've been wanting to get it cut about an inch or 2 ago!! I've just been really hesitant because my allergies came back recently. I've got them under control but its still ickkkky.

speaking of tafe. I got accepted into that certIV graphic design course i applied for
**beams. I'm finally back on track with my life, and i finally feel like everything is going smoothly, i'm going back to school, friends and family are all in good places and i don't need to worry, work is great and i'm saving like a bitch but still not neglecting myself! WOOOOOOO BOY... going to timbaland next month!!!!! the guy is a genius i love 90% of his songs and the other 10% i just don't know... YET!

i swear i was going to mention other things.... but this entry is crazy long.
if you've been a trooper and gone through it all. you know i love you vvvvvvv much =D